Wednesday, October 15, 2008

Signs from God and a Nazi anecdote. I'm sooo diverse!

The tail on my kit-kat clock stopped swinging today for no reason other than to piss me off. It has new batteries and the clock still works, it just won't twitch it's freakin' tail. I wonder if this is a sign from God? Is it his way of telling me that my life is slowly running down or maybe I'm just gonna fall on my "tail" and break it?
How deep! I don't usually pay attention to shit like that but having just proven myself to be psychic (my mainlining dream was followed by a message that H was on the way), I can't be too careful. Now all that remains to be seen is whether the smack is blue or not, if it is I will join the Kenny Kingston Psychic Friends Network and use my amazing new skill to fleece...I mean help others.
Then again, last night I had a dream that I was being terrorized by geese chasing me around the house while I tried to fend them off with, ironically enough, a goose down pillow. These geese were really pissed off as evidenced by their ripping out their own feathers by the bill-full in between attacks. When I woke up, I tried to figure out what I could have done to enrage a gaggle of geese and I came to the conclusion that they must have been upset over the pillow. It was the obvious choice and made a tremendous amount of sense once I thought about it. For some reason I never questioned why they were in my house to begin with. HUH! Priorities.
If anyone has any insight into that little gem, please clue me in. Maybe I don't have "the gift" after all?
So I was thinking that I agree with my latest anon hater, people don't dislike me because I'm an addict, they dislike me because I'm disgusting........disgustingly awesome! Jealous bitches! I really didn't need for anon to point out the fact that I have more than one anonymous hater. I've known that shit all along, it's just that they all sound so alike I've started to lump them all together. In my mind, every time I get some worn out, shitty comment, it immediately gets filed under anonymous douchebag. Nothing individual, I just roll them all up into one big mass of fucktarded-ness and move on,it's less complicated that way.
Casey is in Utah til sometime tonight and I am at a loss as to what to do with myself. I already got a sickening call from Josh( I was asleep and answered the phone like a dumb ass),that lasted up to the point of him telling me he was gonna "kiss it and make it all better." UUUGH!*shudder* I hung up as soon as I heard that foolishness! I still feel faintly nauseous though. Phantom kisses from Josh seem to be clinging to my skin and I don't like it one bit! I already tried showering but it didn't do a damn thing. I swear to God I can almost smell his vomitous Hugo Boss cologne and it's making me ill.
I always told you I hated the smell of that crap Josh, almost as much as I hate being baby-talked. YUK! Find your dignity quick before you lose it permanently.
I should know by now that you can't scrub off Josh, lord knows I've tried. Ladies and gentleman, I give you Josh J. who has the distinction of being the "herpes" of ex-boyfriends. He will never go away and makes himself known at the most inopportune moments. Josh~the gift that keeps on giving. And before anybody I don't have herpes!
My wrist feels like it's on fire it itches so bad, I hope that bitch didn't break the skin. It's so bruised and swollen that I can't really tell yet. I love the way shit like that always hurts more days after the fact.
Today I'm bored but by this time tomorrow I will be smacked back like a motherfucker so it's all good. I have that weird apprehension/anticipation that comes from not having done H for a while, almost like I'm scared and don't want to do it. I will of course because once it's in front of me it will all fall into place. I'm predictable that way, H is my main man.
I was just thinking on a guy I used to know back in the day who belonged to the esteemed brotherhood of the Nazi Low Riders. Being that my blood is 'polluted' by my dad's half Mexican-ness I was always a little confused by the fact that these guys liked to hang out with me. Brad actually lived with me and Casey before he went back to prison and because of that I got to meet alot of his NLR friends. After a while I noticed something damn peculiar, almost every introduction went something like this." Melody, I want you to meet my homeboy from NLR, he used to run the yard out at Lerdo, his name is Mike Garcia" or "this is my ace-deuce motherfucker from NLR, Jason Hernandez" and last but not least, my favorite,"This motherfucker had the keys to the hole, I want you to me Dewayne Rodriguez, yeah he's NLR."
Are y'all starting to see a pattern? Yeah, me too. Being my usual forthright self I just had to ask, "Brad if y'all are all about racial purity and such and you don't care for other races and such......then why the fuck do all of your "racially pure" NLR 'brothers' have beaner last names....and such? Sure they look 'white and right' but the names say different."
In addition to my other talents I speak fluent redneck.
I think this simple yet complex question overtaxed Brad's brain a bit, he had to sit down and think on it. After a few minutes of hard internal deliberation he looked up at me and cried out,"Well, they're white in their hearts!"
WOW, I guess that says it all doesn't it? By that logic it should be no problem for a black man to join the NLR, so long as he's "white in his heart." I think that may have been one of the stupidest things I ever heard come out of his mouth and believe me he was a veritable font of stupidity! He didn't much care for my observation about future black Nazi Low Riders either. HAHA whatever, he wasn't such a bad guy if you could look past the inbreeding and hate crimes. I find the good in everybody, even inbred morons. More people should be like me , why can't we all just get along?......says the girl who recently pummeled a tweeker hag just to watch her die.....uh I mean shut up.
Anyway, enough blah, blah, blah. Miss me kids, I'll miss you back. Melody Lee