Monday, July 14, 2008

My teenage years...gone but not forgotten

I just came across one of my favorite Desendents songs, bikeage. I set it as my default song so y'all can enjoy it as well. I remember one of my semi-steady boyfriends/fucks having his band cover this song as a tribute to me after we broke up. Instead of being embarrassed or feeling insecure, I remember laughing and taking a bow as everyone turned to look at me (he did it at an all ages show on a Saturday night). It's not like everybody in that town didn't already know my business anyway. It is ironic however that at the time he dropped his musical bomb, I was not selling my ass for smack.
I was just getting to the point where shooting up every day was sounding better and better. I still had alot of resources, so hitting the streets wasn't necessary. I guess he thought if he laid it out for me in those terms, you know, "This is where you're gonna end up if you don't stop" that I would get my head out of my ass and stop. Wrong!
Preaching at me from the top of your instrument laden soapbox is not the way to get me to do anything. Silly boy. I only do things when I feel like it. Even if you have a good idea, I won't consider it until it seems like it occurred to me first. It must be a good idea if I thought of it.
Anyway, the song brought back some memories. Sitting on the corner of 19 and eye street, loaded waiting for the sun to go all the way down so all the other asshole fuck-ups could put in an appearance. Laying the seats back in my big ol' car (1978 Oldsmobile Regency 77) and smoking a cig after a really good shot. Cruising around, pissed cause we had just copped and everyone but me was fixing(I had to drive). Mike telling me to stop whining and find a spot to park and me being a smart-ass and parking in front of the police station, a carload of junkies with needles at the ready.
We had alot of good times interspersed with bullshit but now all I remember is the fun. In alot of ways it's all I got cause some of the people I reminisce about are dead and gone and I couldn't make new memories with them if I wanted to. In some cases the past is all I have left. More's the pity.
On a side note, the guy who sang to me," Whose gonna pick you up and take you home with them tonight? Not me!" did end up taking me home. We got back together a few weeks later and I took great delight in leaning over to him at odd moments and whispering, "Not me!" Just like me to rub it in huh .
Love, Melody"when you're on the streets with a needle in your arm, selling your body for another fix" Lee