Thursday, November 6, 2008

It's all in the genes

It was so cold today! I'm such a complainer, too hot...too cold, I'm never happy. I think Anna may be moving out here, one of my best homegirls flying to my side, that's friendship! I suppose it doesn't hurt that her husband is getting extradited back to Cali and she doesn't really like the town she's living in, I also promised to help her out with some cash to get a place here. I prefer to think that it's the friendship not all the reasons I just listed but who knows, friendship is a fickle thing sometimes......I won't hold that against her.
I'm sorely tempted to fly to Oregon (or is it Washington?) and collect her myself, just to have something to do. Somehow I don't think that St Helens has an airport, maybe I'll go to Covington first and then coerce Regina into driving me, yeah that sounds better. I can't even imagine the chaos that would descend once we were all together+ Anna's 2 kids.
Before someone goes off on the state of her and her kids, let me say that Anna hasn't done smack since the year 2000 and she doesn't drink anymore or do any other drugs. She's a good mom, if a bit vociferous and her kids are a riot.
Anyway, it's something to think about. I spent most of today in bed because I didn't want to turn on the heater and it was cold as fuck. I read and then read some more, I know super interesting, that's me.
I saw the craziest shit on TV the other day.....heaters being shilled by the Amish! I don't know quite what to think about that. It said that the mantles on these electric fireplaces were made by skilled Amish craftsmen and most of the commercial was a vignette of them performing said craftsmanship. The climax is a shot of an Amish guy driving away in a horse drawn wagon with two of the ridiculous things loaded in the back.It was funny as fuck and I had to go get Casey just to make sure I wasn't imagining things.
I'm sorry but when did the Amish sell out? I'm confused but my knowledge of Amish culture doesn't extend much past having seen Witness so I can't expound on this concept as much as I'd like. Maybe I should do some research so I Can come back and really have at it. Maybe not.
So an older member of my family has recently acquired a boyfriend through some strange twist of fate. This guy just called up one day and started talking to her and being that she's at least 70 yrs old, she had nothing better to do than talk back. Don't get the wrong idea, from what she says he isn't a perv, he's just lonely and needs somebody to talk to. He sings her songs and writes her poetry and it's all kinda sweet. I mean I wouldn't have anything to do with someone who wrote me poetry just as a matter of principle (YUK!), but she seems to like it.
Well all was going good, he told her that initially it had been a wrong number but once he heard her voice, he decided to pursue it. I've heard of stranger shit.
Anyway the reason I'm privy to this information is because they had a fight the other day during which he revealed the shocking news that he is NOT a businessman from Fresno..........he is actually an inmate in Avenal making chancy phone calls on a contraband pre-paid cell he bought from one of the COs. Un-fucking-believable!
So being that I have some experience in these sorts of matters she rang me and gave me his CDC ID# and other pertinent info so I could do a check on him. My uh family member's new boyfriend is a 65 yr old cholo from Orange County who is doing 2 years in Avenal for involvement in a shooting. Niiiice!
This happens to be my mom's side of the family too, it's interesting to note that maybe my self destructive tendencies aren't all passed down from my dad's screwy gene pool.
My mom found out and apparently had a shit fit, snatching the phone away from our hapless relative and threatening to pull his balls out through his nostrils if he so much as showed his face after his release. Go mom! My mother doesn't suffer fools! At least not anymore, since she married this last time (#3 or is it 4?), she has run a tight ship and the only fool allowed aboard is me. She has to 'cause I'm her baby *smirk* and she is obligated to love me.
So anyway, my family is nuts, even the normal ones. My dad's family is a nightmare that would take way too long to dissect.
I love my daddy, even if he is a little psycho and his idea of reverse psychology was telling me what a bad dope dealer I was and that he would never have condescended to dirty his hands with less than 10 pieces. I was nickle and dime-ing it according to him and unless I wanted to shame the family I needed to graduate from grams to pieces pronto! I was happy to oblige and daddy was astounded that I took to it like I did, I guess I got his head for business. *snicker*
It was kinda weird dealing with the same people as my dad had, years before. Most of my connects either knew him or knew of him and he never let me forget that he could have me cut off if he so desired. Hmmmph! I'd like to have seen him try! My daddy's famous for all the wrong reasons and I was buying, selling and shooting with some of the same people who had seen me as a newborn. Crazy!
My dad's funny and even though he scares the shit outta Casey we have a pretty good time hanging out with him. He stopped using years and years before I started and has stayed clean which is good....for him. I always get a kick out of his war stories where he is this INSANE heroin addict/dealer who was so hardcore that people OD'd on his cottons. Sure dad, whatever. I'm beginning to see where I get my delusions of grandeur. He's all covered in prison ink and he looks a lil intimidating but he's my Father and he isn't the hell-raising, junk-dealing biker that he used to be. He still flies his colors but for the most part he's settled.
My mom refuses to utter his name and I suppose I don't blame her, it couldn't have been easy for her. She was a proper young thing and to this day I still can't get either of them to tell me how the fuck they ended up together. I know it wasn't because of me, I was born 2 years after they married. Oh well, another mystery.
My mom's parents always acted like he was the proverbial bogey man, actually her whole family did. She must've been pretty determined to have him, maybe she was going through a bad boy phase, I can sympathize with that, mine never ended. I'm just more suited to it than she was, obviously.
They were both really young and my mom was spoiled as all get out so if she threw a tantrum I can see my Grandfather caving in, my Grandmother would have washed her hands of the entire situation by that point. I hear my Dad supported them in fine style and even turned down the house my mom's parents offered them as a wedding present, so it wasn't her money that he was interested in, I guess on some level opposites really do attract. Ancient history.
I'ma go now, after giving you-all a peek into the insanity that is my family tree I'm spent and the need to smoke is overwhelming and *sigh*yes I have to drag my ass out into the freezing night air to do it, YAY! Loves you, Melody