Damn that was one deep dive into my fucked up psyche wasn't it? Don't worry, it doesn't happen too often, I blame an excess of shrooms, wine, percs etc for my lapse into "deep thinker" mode. I was also listening to Christian Death for 2 days straight...pretty sure that didn't help either. I love C.D., that's why I'm gonna leave it on my default a bit longer, so y'all can enjoy it with me haha.
I wonder if digging C.D. makes me a hypocrite? I wonder if I care? Regina has accused me of being a closet emo-goth lesbian (ugh emo) on several occasions....I think she just wants to get in my pants hahahaha.
I have an unfortunate affection for The Killers and she sees it as a personal affront. What can I say, their latest album excluded, I do indeed love The Killers, how current of me. Brandon Flowers is a pontificating jackass but so am I, maybe that's the attraction
I also have an un-natural love for ABBA so I guess I can burn my music snob membership card right now. Eh it was good while it lasted.
Anyway, it's my nature to try and make light of things that I would rather not go into but.....the things I wrote in my last post were...are absolutely true. I miss them every day and it's a double edged sword to see them in dreams and then wake up to lose them all over again. So cheerful....
Anyway, today I am strawberry ice cream and I'm gonna exploit that and be even MORE brilliant than usual. I am brilliant.....just in case y'all hadn't figured that out yet heheh. I could be all melted by tomorrow, so today is all I get.
Now that I'm mobile I....we have been thinking of taking a cross country junky adventure. A fellow junkster girlie and myself have decided we will start on the West Coast and zigzag towards the East, hitting up every contact we know on the way.
Casey calls it my Dopefiend underground railroad haha so true. We are gonna document the whole trip on paper and film, possibly 8mm to give it that grimy 70's home movie feeling. Oh and positively zillions of pics. It will be the junkie's guide to North America or some such shit. We'll figure out a clever title when and if we complete our trip. I have a feeling that we might have a bit of a problem...you know, living through it and all but I'm up for the challenge.
I also realize that slamming our way across America is a little ambitious but we are both pretty confident in our abilities and with enough confidence you can rule the world...or at least shoot your way around it.
Casey is NOT impressed! He made a smart assed remark about us "banging" our way through our lil adventure and I don't think he meant dope. HAHA,I would NEVER!EV-ER!
This is quite possibly the worst and most genius idea I have ever come up with, if I live through it will have been totally worth it and if I don't, it'll be too late to care anyway.
Nihilistic? Fatalistic? I don't think I'm either of those things, for me to try and pull those off would be way too contrived and a big hassle to boot. I'm too lazy to keep up the charade, it'd be like trying to play vegan while snarfing down McDonald's on the sly. HAHA I love McMurders (obscure vegan-ish reference).
I'll keep y'all posted as the plans develop. My Russian friends could probably add to the fun and then we could hit TJ as well. The big problem being that the communist despises heroin........hence the kidnapped to rehab episode.They dig coke though....hmmmm, something to think about.
I finally got the lame-o camera to read so I'll up some pics now and then. Can't have too many random pics of random bullshit.
Bye bye babies, Love me...I promise I'll love you back. xoxo Melody
