I've got 5 4 3 2 1.......and a fascination with sub-standard porn

(Yeah I know they're not red but they still kick ass!)


So it's no big surprise that I'm at home this weekend, I'm still quarantined. Not really but I may as well be. I'm bored and have been falling back on some of my more eccentric forms of self entertainment. No not that kinda self entertainment pervs!
I've been listening to alot of my old records and CDs. Going back to stuff I haven't heard in years. My taste in music is so weird on any given day I can be listening to The Electric Eels one minute and then switch over to Hank Williams and then maybe some Dusty Springfield capped off with Gwar and Softcell. Today it was Crass and Billy Holiday. My stereo is like the world's most fucked up mix tape.
I've always liked Crass but I never really gave a shit about their politics. I'm the least politically involved person I know. I just don't give a fuck about any of it, I'm selfish and could care less about the state of govmt in this or any other country. I don't care how ignorant it sounds, it's the truth. I've been hearing about drastic shit going down in this country for as long as I can remember and I never really had it affect me one way or the other therefor I don't give a fuck. Yeah yeah I know, every person makes a difference blah blah blah whatever.
Anyway, I was listening to Crass- Penis Envy and was reminded once again that my mind works in weird ways.
For instance when I hear Eve Libertine screeching out Bata Motel, I don't think about the (supposed) ongoing repression and objectification of women.....I think about how rad it would be to put on "My red high heels" and have some guy "Drive me fast and crash me crazy" so I can " Rise from the wreckage as fresh as a daisy" and have him "Strap my ankles,break my heels, make me feel, make me kneel...."
Fucked up right? I have a feeling that this was NOT the message Crass was trying to get across. Oh well, it is what it is....not the first time my thought process has been a lil twisted. HAHA is that ever an understatement!
I'm not really a masochist. What appeals to me in theory would NEVER fly in real life. I've gotten my ass beat enough times to know that it's not as fun as it seems even if sex is eventually involved. Gracias Grant, you ruined my chances for a career as a submissive bondage slut!
As for all that safe-word, controlled S&M shit, that just seems retarded to me. A word that makes everyone stop if it hurts too much, where's the fun in that? No follow through, no commitment!
I'm too bitchy and mean to ever be a true submissive anyway, I would just end up turning the tables and brutalizing some poor B&D dork with strap-on sex toys for wasting my time with his stupid plasti-cuffs, and gay leather hoods!
I'm sure you-all really wanted to know that.........that's why I shared.
Another thing I've been doing is indulging my love of really awful low-quality amateur porn. I don't watch it to get off, oh no,no,no! I watch it because it is sooooo bad and soooo ridiculous that it's funny as hell and I can laugh for hours. As far as I'm concerned there are few things better than watching some amateur wannabe pornstar try and look hot while some hairy, fat-assed douchebag is trying drive his penis through the back of her head! Priceless! It's my version of America's funniest home videos and way more entertaining than watching a toddler kick his dad in the nads for the million-th time.
I saw one last night that had me pissing my pants it was so funny. This Paris Hilton look-a-like was giving what may possibly have been the worlds worst blowjob and believe me, I am more than qualified to judge. *snigger*
She was trying hard to look sexy but you could tell that she was so not into it. The guy had a HUGE cock and he kept shoving her head down onto it. She did her best to keep this from happening by wrapping her hands around it but he was relentless. The end result was her with dick so far down her throat that her eyes kept crossing. I shit you not, every time he pushed her down on it the bitch went cross-eyed and blew snot bubbles. It was fucking HILARIOUS and only made better by the fact that she kept trying to say naughty-provocative things while is was taking place.
As close as I could tell, she kept asking, "Do you like that? Is that good?" but it sounded more like, "Ooo ooo ike at?*bluahrg-snort* esh at ooog? *aaack ugh*" Poor stupid thing, looking for approval and reassurance from a jerk-off whose one goal in life is to fuck her stomach through her mouth.
I have no problem laughing at her expense either because just like no one forced me onto the streets no one forced her to suck giant cock in front of a camera. If you submit to letting yourself get fucked six ways from Sunday in some amateur gang bang then I can chortle to my hearts content and not feel bad for one filthy second.
Tis also the season for holiday themed porn, which is another of my hobbies. I love those goofy titles, they are almost better than the movies themselves. "Deck the balls" and my personal Thanksgiving favorite "Humkpin Pie."
I'm really disappointed that they haven't come out with a re-issue of A Clockwork Orgy, a shame really. It's a classic!
Fuck! I cut my finger earlier when I was cooking and it's still oozing! Thanx to those anti-coagulants they pumped into me, I've been bleeding and bruising like a hemophiliac. I look like I have leukemia, there are bruises all over my arms, neck and stomach.
I have been cooking alot as well, just because I have nothing better to do. Between having k1tten call me a domestic slut and Josh whining about the fact that these domestic skills were all but non-existent when I lived with him, I think I may have to lay off the Martha Stuart routine. I am NOT a domestic slut.....I'm imported! HAHA and clever too!
I was watching TV and came to the realization that as far as actual acting goes, I think Bill and Ted's excellent adventure may be the best thing Keanu Reeves has ever done. Am I the only one who thinks his acting is comparable to watching paint dry? A razor blade enema holds more appeal! Sitting through most of his movies is torturous, like watching a man sized puppet being put through the it's paces by a guy with a monotone voice box and zero personality.
Anyway, I have to go smoke now so I will end this convoluted tour through my psyche, I'm not actually this random and scattered in real life.....at least I don't think I am. Hmmmm, something to ponder. I'm normal, it's everybody else that's fucked up. Heh heh, riiiiiight.
Au revoir mon chous, Je t'adore. Melody

What didn't kill me yesterday makes me harder to kill tomorrow

How ironic is it that the day after I posted the fact that I have nothing to bitch about I landed in the hospital? *sigh* Only in my world.
Before I launch into my hospital adventure I wanna thank everybody who sent me messages etc via k1tten and myspace, you guys made me feel so.......loved haha and you know I eat that shit up!
K1tten called the house the same day I was admitted and upon hearing that I was on my deathbed promptly stalked me. It's funny 'cause she actually tracked me down before Casey was able to. He was still trying to force info from the nurse's station while I was blabbing to k. She also spammed me all over blogger to let everyone know I was at death's door which really appeals to my sense of the melodramatic.
Thanx k1tty, you tha best girl!
So on Friday morning I was outside smoking with Casey before he left for work and I was bitching about the fact that my feet had been kinda swollen and ache-y. It was about 40 degrees but I was barefoot and happened to look down.........my feet looked purple and shiny and my toes resembled ready to burst blood sausages. Tasty right?
I pointed this out to Casey who was suitably impressed. I was doing a great job of staying calm until I noticed the black-ish streaks running from my feet and climbing up my calves.
I closed my eyes, whimpered, "Babe, think I need to go to the emergency room" and then smoked like 5 cigs in a row. Anybody who has been a long time Dopefiend knows what black streaks mean and it's NOT good. As long as I have been doing H I have heard tales of the dreaded black streaks and was always hella thankful that I had never experienced them firsthand.
Don't get me wrong, I have had some gnarly abscesses. I even had a few that made me so sick I was sure that they were gonna take me out because I refused to go be butchered at the hands of some "I told you so" E room doctor. I would just trade some smack for antibiotics and suffer though it. I am and have always been disgustingly healthy for someone who has done what I do so I always recovered nicely and continued on my way. Even feverish and puking from infection I always kept a sharp lookout for the black streaks that would indicate blood poisoning and immenent death.
We went to the E-room and I was admitted after about 15 minutes which had to be an indication of my condition but by this time I had come to terms with the situation and was reasonably chill about the whole thing.
They nurse took one look at me and went for the doc. He looked at me and confirmed the fact that I did indeed have blood poisoning and would be spending some time at their mercy. Acute Cellulitis was the actual diagnosis, along with some other shit I can't remember.
I was too busy trying to explain to the nurses that they were so not getting any blood from my arms. As usual they paid me no mind and proceeded to turn me into a pincushion. I kept telling them that they were gonna have to stick my neck but nobody listens to me. Casey was rolling his eyes as he watched them go through the motions of tying me off and feeling around for veins that disappeared long ago, we've been through this before.
One nurse managed to spear a spidery lil sucker on the top of my right hand. I was hoping against hope that it would hold and it did.....for a few minutes. He was using it to run a line into me and before he hooked it up to the bag he pumped me with a shot of morphine. It burned like hell but was worth it for the 30 sec it lasted. Morphine sucks! It also kicked the shit outta that tiny vein and when he plugged in the saline it leaked under the skin and had to be taken out.
While all this was going on the other nurse had been jabbing away at my left hand, going so far as to try and catch the veins on my knuckles. That does not feel nice! I mean I've done worse to myself but for some reason a fat shot is way more appealing than a bag of salt water and therefor worth the ouch. I know, I know......I was really sick and getting a line in me was important, can't help the fact that I think like a junky though.
After coming up empty on both sides one genius nurse pointed out the vein running across the palm of my left hand and through the meaty part under my thumb. No fuckin' way! That shit hurts so bad I could never even get it trough the top layer of skin and believe me I tried!
I told 'em to get fucked but was eventually coerced into going ahead with it. That cunt dug around under my thumb for-fucking-ever and got jack shit! For some reason I let her try again in my palm when what I really wanted to do was take that stupid butterfly and stick it in her fucking eye! She got that one and stole 6 vials of blood from me.................3 minutes before the doc came in with an ultrasound machine and proceeded to put a line in my neck! I don't think I have to point out the irony.
I didn't even feel the needle go in and I got hit with another shot of Morphine as soon as they were done,so it wasn't a total waste.
Casey had to run to work and they moved me to a room in the main hospital. I got hooked up to some super strong IV antibiotic and then had to answer a bunch of stupid questions. My new doc came in, asked me if I was in pain and then promptly prescribed a schedule of IV Dilaudid every 4 hours and Lortab every 6. Oh and Restoril for my fragile nerves. *frail sigh* I may have hammed it up a lil bit.
That first shot of D straight into my neck made me giggle it felt so freakin good! This hospital shit was starting to look up! The Lortab was useless but I took it anyway just on the off chance that it might enhance the D. Even sick as hell I still have my priorities straight! *snicker*
I got to lay in bed, watch TV and nod out which was awesome but I also had to get stabbed in the gut with anti-coagulants 2x a day. They were worried that the line in my neck would throw a clot and cause an aneurysm or something.
While I was there they swabbed me for MRSA and guess what? I was diseased, lucky me, like cellulitis wasn't bad enough! They said it was really common in NM and that it was nothing to worry about and then shoved some kinda gel up my nose 3x a day from that point on.
I made it damn clear that I could get to the bathroom on my own, no catheter for me thank you!
The antibiotic was going in me 24/7 and it was so strong that it made me nauseous. That was compounded by the fact that the food they were trying to force on me smelled like hot barf and looked like wallpaper paste with chunks floating in it. I would rather dine at the county jail for a year than ever have to smell or taste that crap again.
The times they didn't stick around to make sure I was eating I flushed that vomitous shit but sometimes I was obligated to eat some. They wouldn't hit me with the D til I ate.....Nazi's!
At one point they wanted to put in a pic line but I vetoed that noise! You would think that the thought of a semi-permanent sure-shot line would appeal to me but there's something about them threading a catheter up towards my heart that freaks me out. If I had stayed in longer I wouldn't have had a choice, they will only use the same IV site for 4 days before they move to another to avoid infection.
Casey was smuggling in candy and McDonald's and I was sneaking onto the balcony to smoke. I mean I had to smoke after I got my shot of D but dragging that IV shit around was a pain in my ass!
Casey reminded me of his last hospital stay in Bako, when I came to visit every day and was shooting H into his IV the whole time. We just had to keep our fingers crossed that the nurse wouldn't notice the brown cloudy shit in his line. HAHA I'm such an awesome junky girlfriend! He said he would have returned the favor but A) we had no H and B) I was getting loaded enough already. True but how loaded is loaded enough?
So that's pretty much it, on the 4th day I bid farewell to my friend Dilaudid and did my damnedest to convince the doc to release me. My feet were almost back to normal and the horrid black streaks were just faint shadows that were rapidly fading.
I really didn't want that pic line!
I got out Monday night and came home with scrips for Augmentin, Bactaban gel and Lortab. If all goes well I should be disease free by the end of the cycle. My blood work came back clean for everything which is a miracle in itself. I'm still kinda amazed that I never picked up Hep or HIV, Christ knows I had enough chances, just lucky I guess.
The Lortabs were supposed to last 2 weeks but are GONE, what a fucking surprise. They are worse than useless but as I said before, the druggie in me takes them just in case they might work. I'm still waiting on that!
I'm sorry it took so long for me to post and let y'all know I had not kicked off just yet. That Augmentin makes me pukey so I have been laying on the couch watching TCM and snarfing down sour bears. I'm not malingering......not really.
I've told Casey that there might be a chance that I have to go back if the Aug. doesn't work. He told me if that happened he would probably lose his job and have a nervous breakdown. I didn't realize how worried he was until I came home. He told me that he hated that I was gone and that the house was weird without me. My being sick really wrecked him, he actually got a little pale when I mentioned going back.
There's nothing quite like knowing your honey would miss you if you died, especially considering the fact that I have done shit that left some of my ex's willing to commit human sacrifice on the off chance I might expire. HAHA good luck with that fuckers *smug smirk* I'm too much of an asshole to die. The world needs me!
So now I have one more reason to hate New Mexico, this wasteland managed to do what 10 + years of living in and out of junky squalor did not. For whatever reason all the I time spent in filthy squats, shooting galleries, motel rooms and jail never touched me. A little over a year in NM, alot of that time clean and I get diseased! NM mud is apparently toxic and carries cooties, go figure.
I love you guys and didn't mean to leave anyone in suspense, thanx again for all the well wishes etc. It really did help.
I won't say much to the haters who are gnashing their teeth at my recovery, just this, "Too bad,,,,,,,,,HAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHA"
Ciao for now kids, (a slightly less diseased) Melody Lee
P.S. Hope y'all like the pic, I woulda made a damn fine zombie!

2 Minutes you'll never get back....................

I have been so fucking lazy this week, I mean I'm always lazy but this time I really outdid myself. I've been laying around the house doing no-thing! Although I have managed to drag my lethargic ass into the shower regularly the fact that I've been wearing the same grungy black flag shirt for days kinda cancels out any attempts to maintain cleanliness.I don't care, fuck it. I'll change tomorrow...........maybe.
I think I'm getting too old to be going on speed binges, I could do that shit all day everyday when I was a kid but now...............apparently I'm an old broad who can't handle her shit. C'est la vie.
I don't have anything especially earth-shattering to share with y'all today but then again, when do I ever? I was thinking about typing out the "raid" story but......... I'm tiiiiiiired. HAHA I don't think I know anybody besides myself who can be totally exhausted after a long day of doing nothing. Being this useless is hard work!
I came across my old friend Turkey via Regina on myspace, I'm a myspace loooooooser. So sad.......
Anyway he's still the same old fuckface, he's living in Colorado somewhere and I was surprised to realize I actually miss that fool! We thought he was dead, having heard from some traveling squatters that he had OD'd and been found in a dumpster. Knowing Turkey the way we did, it wasn't hard to believe. I'm glad he's not dead and from what I've heard he's doing better so yay Tracy (Turkey).
I need to buy a car! I've been spending too much$$ on useless shit when I should be saving it for my trip to Eugene. I really don't need anymore shoes or clothes or records or whatever.
Blaaaah....BORING! I bet y'all are even now regretting your decision to come here and read my update, there's 2 minutes you'll never get back.
Dr. Finch....I'm blocked!
I find myself thinking that I wish my life was like a Wes Anderson movie, where everybody is fucked-up but it only makes you like them more and they cruise through life backed by an awesome soundtrack.
Am I feeling sorry for myself? Is that what this is?
Fuck a buncha that shit, I am so not gonna throw myself a pity party! I have nothing to piss and moan about anyway, I have a decent house, I have money, a crazy moody boyfriend that loves me.........if I heard me complaining I'd kick my ass!
I'm gonna go force myself into the shower now and I may even put on a clean shirt. After I re-gain my usual snarky good attitude I'll come back and post something a little more amusing........Christ, I'm such a blog-whore. Loves you bitches, Melody

More random pics

Me and Regina at fisherman's wharf pre-shaved head era, obviously still in our skater phase, check those huge clothes we have on.

Me passed out at the Savoy after a loooong New Years Eve, Christ, how many giant T-shirts did I own?

Cameron, Regina, Barfnana and Ron B.

Regina and Brandi somewhere in downtown Bako

My boring update and a tale of past Nazi antics

So it's late and cold and I'm staying in tonight despite the fact that I did get a call earlier. No spegakked road trips for Melody....not this weekend! It's taken me this long to get back to normal (as normal as I get) and I'm not in any hurry to fuck that up. My H is also all gone so without that to look forward to I'd rather not get wired at all. Then again I may do it just to spite myself, one never knows with me.
Since someone pointed out that my blog description was a bit garbled I decided to change it. Rather than re-word the whole thing I just put up a quote. I was too lazy to do much else and it is a great quote. I wish I could say that it's my motto but I'm too argumentative to stick to it. Arguing can be a form of explanation after all and I LIVE to argue.
Anyway, I could go into a detailed description of my boring weekend but I won't, I'll save y'all the experience.
I saw a commercial for some kind of hearing aide/amplifier and it made me think about something that NLR Brad did. We were living at Kristen's and I was selling, it was me, Casey, Frog, Brad and Ron. Brad was one of these people who had to do speed w/ his H, we called it a goofball. I don't care for it but Brad wouldn't have it any other way. Essentially the speed would cancel out the H and he would be well but tweeked. He was technically a heroin addict but he never really got loaded because of the speed.
He used to get super paranoid and do all kinds of weird shit, after a week or so of being up he would start to talk in an annoying Donald Duck voice and strip down to his boxers right before he crashed. For some reason I would always find him in his underwear muttering Donald-speak with only one shoe on. One shoe on every fucking time!
Anyway, we had been having alot of drama with the cops, they were constantly cruising by the house and stopping people as they left, trying to catch somebody holding. They followed us to the store and anywhere else we went and it was pretty obvious that they were gonna hit us soon.
So one day Ron comes racing into the room and he's laughing and shaking his head, he had gone to the store with Brad to get some foil and Brad had found something that caught his interest. I was trying to get info out of a giggling Ron when Brad comes in and announces that he has the solution to our impending raid dilemma. Casey, Frog and I were all ears, we had been trying to figure out something that would buy us some time once the cops were closing in.
So we watched as Brad pulled out 5 little plastic toys, a roll of speaker wire and some electrical tape. Mystified I looked to Ron who just shook his head and looked away smiling. Mr. NLR had launched into a tweek induced explanation that took way too long and made absolutely NO sense. I tried to get a clear answer but after about 20 minutes of nothing but convoluted tweek speak Frog yelled out, "He wants to use the toys as a ghetto surveillance system!" Frog was better at deciphering tweeker than the rest of us.
I took one of the toys and lo and behold it was a 50 cent ear spy, the kind you get out of a candy machine. He had 5 of these things and quickly recruited Frog, Casey and Ron to help him with his project.
The help involved belly crawling through the yard laying wire (because the cops might be watching and surely they wouldn't notice 4 dipshits slithering through 3 inch grass)and then placing the ear spies at various intervals around the yard. I sat in the house and laughed at them while yelling disparaging comments out the window.
After they were done, Brad wired it all up to some headphones and proceeded to tweek off on every little noise. It sounded like shit by the way, all you could hear was cars driving by and birds chirping.
Needless to say it didn't work the way it was supposed to(shocking I know) and the morning we got hit the only thing heard (it was wired to a speaker by then)was crickets chirping and Brad gibbering Donald-speak while he washed his car in the backyard......in his boxers with one shoe on. *sigh*
That particular raid is a story in itself, it was funny as hell! All I can say is we musta been pretty jaded to find it as amusing as we did. I'll have to tell y'all about it sometime.....as if anybody cares. Fuckin' BPD is always good for a laugh.
Pretty random post. I guess I'm still a lil burned out, like that time I did too much coke and nitrous and forgot how to tie my shoes for a week. Wow, that sounds bad, even to me.
I guess that's enough for now, I'll leave y'all to your own devices. Happy Sunday kids, XOXO Melody

Sunday night......KC lights not optional

As per a special myspace request I've attempted sleep and have dragged my ass to the computer to bang out the tale of the crystal fiasco. UGH, I still feel like crrrrraaaap! I passed out sometime this morning....finally and had maybe 5 hours of sleep. Sorry about the phone k1tten, I left it.......somewhere and didn't hear it.
Fuck it's cold.........
Sunday night:

The phone rang for like 15 minutes before I answered it, Casey was in bed and I was watching Entourage so it was probably around 10pm....11pm? Something like that, the voice blaring out at me was that of the meth monster. What followed was possibly the most complex convo ever.

Rainman: "Whatcha doin?"
Me: "Watching Entourage."
Rainman: "Gonna come get you, tell your old man you're heading out."
Me: "Nope."
Rainman: "He asleep?"
Me: "Yup"
Rainman: "Leave him a note and get ready."
Me: "Uh uh."
Rainman: "What'cha got something better to do?"
Me: "Jeremy Piven."
Rainman: "Who? Tell that guy to get fucked, we're going for a drive."
Me: *snort-mumble*
Rainman : "Get ready, I'm getting in the car right now."
Me: "No."
Rainman: "Be there in twenty..."
Me: "N...no."
Rainman: "I'll honk...."
Me: "No."
Rainman: "In twenty." *click*
Me: "Hello? FUCK!!!"

He did NOT answer when I called back....tweekin' bastard! I knew if I didn't get ready he'd wake up the whole street with his stupid honking and then probably come pound on the door and wake up Casey too. Some people obviously can't take no for an answer.
It was so freakin' cold I put on jeans and a thermal shirt and grabbed my hoodie. I ended up taking this stupid long leather coat that is HUGE! It's seriously like 2 whole cows and it looks all Matrix. L-A-M-E!
Anyway it seemed like he took longer than twenty minutes but that might be because I was in a foul mood and feeling uncharitable. When he pulled up he was driving one of his project cars, some lowered junker with a furry gold interior that was covered in bondo/primer. Disco tweeker mobile.... fucking brilliant! All that car needs are plates that say "ARRSTME* to be complete. It's a rolling cop magnet, especially after 10pm on a Sunday night.
As soon as I opened the door I got knocked back by the smell of speed and hot glass. That fool was hitting his pipe right in front of the house! I wouldn't really mind but for the fact that there are two(count 'em) FPD cocksuckers that live not five houses away from me. New Mexico cops are pretty thick but COME ON!
I got in the car and slumped down in the seat, pissed to be out in the cold and none too enthused about the pipe being shoved in my face. I musta said "fuck off" 5 times......before I took it. Haha, I'm no pushover.
After a couple hits I was feeling tons friendlier so I asked where we were going and got a sideways smirk for my trouble.
"T' pick up a car."
That's all he would say so I busied myself with the pipe and took the wheel occasionally so he could hit it too. Fuck it right? I was already stuck so why not go all out.
We drove for about 15 min heading out on one of the various dirt roads that surround this shit town. Rainman pulled into what looked like a truck yard. There was a rusty double wide hidden behind all the equipment.....SHOCKER!
We got out and he had me run up to the door to get keys. When the door opened it was my old friend Gabby aka torebackula aka the rabid bitch that bit me. That dump smelled like ether and dog farts, stellar combo. I rolled my eyes, held out my hand and said, "Keys." I can convey more with an eye-roll than most people can with a whole speech.
She stared at me like a stupid heifer (my sincerest apologies to cows the world over)and then spun around and went into the bowels(haha) of the dog fart trailer. I'd be damned if I was gonna go after her,it fucking stunk in there! I went back to the car where Rainman was digging through the trunk. I was just in time to see him pull what looked alot like a gun from behind his back and stash it in the trunk......@%*&#@%*!FUCK!
I'm not gun phobic unless I happen to be traveling with a person known as the meth savant. I don't call him that for no reason, he's a dipshit and I'm a bigger dipshit for letting myself get embroiled in another one of his schemes. Lets not forget that this is the same genius who thought it would be a super idea to give 19 yr old Richie and Eric a couple balls of cryssy.......TO SELL! The same shit they later got popped for.
Anyway, I made it clear that I would walk home(ugh) if he didn't rid himself of any and all firearms. I was so not up to getting jailed for traipsing around with an armed felon who is also absconding from parole, the both of us wired as fuck with God knows how much speed in our possession.
He assured me he was gun free and asked for the keys, a smart assed smile on his dopey face. I informed him that Miss Torebackula had fled into stinky recesses of the hell trailer. He laughed and said that was because she was scared.
Scared? Of me? I can't imagine why that is.
He said it's because I made her into a snaggle-puss. What the fuck? Apparently it happened sometime during our little disagreement. It musta been while she repeatedly rammed her face into my fist that she chipped her front tooth on my ring. Not my fault.
He went after the keys himself (brave soul) and came out laughing because Gabby had barricaded herself in the bedroom and had shoved the keys under the door. What a cooze!
We walked behind the trailer and climbed into a big-ass truck, complete with KC lights and tool bed. This shit was just getting better and better. He said we were gonna use the crane on the back to..........retrieve something.
At this point I was wishing that Rainman had blown himself up long before we had the chance to cross paths. Not that I'm saying he would have any reason to be in a meth lab explosion, it's just some random scenario I pulled outta my ass.
I don't really know where we went because it was dark and everything looks the same in this wasteland. It had been raining that week so it was muddy and Rainman was driving like a retard. That stupid truck was sliding all over the place, making it extremely difficult for me to smoke my speed with any degree of confidence.
On the way he filled me in on Eric and Richie but that's a story for another time. We got where we were going(BFE) and he got out and turned on some spotlight thingie and started sweeping it around. I was not thrilled to find out that we were in some mud pit on the most godforsaken patch of earth ever created (besides Vegas).In the dark no less. Perfect!
He found what he was looking for because he came and tapped on the window and said he needed help. I climbed outta the truck and promptly ate shit, landing on my ass in the mud, luckily that queer leather coat was between me and the ground. I did however get mud all over my hands and feet (my green chucks are currently brown).
He had me hold a flashlight while he fucked with the crane, it took me a minute to realize that the spotlight was shining on a muddy lump of metal. Looking closer I saw that it was a car buried halfway in mud and tipped at a funny angle like it was in a ditch. Brilliant! I can only surmise that some moron was driving that car out there in the rain when one of those oh-so-famous flash floods hit and wiped him out into a ditch. I had a pretty good idea who that moron was too, he was standing to my left fucking with crane controls.
I had a bit of a shock when I realized that said moron was preparing to boom the crane all the way out to lever the car outta the mud. Idiot! We were flailing around in calf-deep sludge and this fool was gonna get us stuck or worse. Explaining the situation took way longer than it should have because for some reason Rainman couldn't grasp the concept. I think he finally gave up trying and took my word for it. He went for the winch instead. I woulda said fuck it and come back when it was dry but he had to do it right then....of course.
Flash forward to Rainman sliding (in the mud) under the car and "retrieving" something. I had no desire whatsoever to know what was taped in that package but I could imagine. I was not happy, he on the other hand was whistling he was so pleased with himself......dimwit!
"OK" he said, "Lets go."
I asked him what he was gonna do about the car.
"Leave it, it won't come back to me anyway"
It's things like that that make me wonder how it's possible that the same individual can be so smart in one sitch yet so stupid in another. He truly is a meth savant.
We drove back to his place and after disappearing into the bedroom for a few he came back with a plate. On top of this plate was some cryssy, a new point and a spoon. Haha Rainman just went up in status. I needed something to perk me up anyway, I was felling a little limp and the pipe wasn't doing it for me no more. I banged a shot that was likely too much and after I was able to breathe again I hit him up for some clothes and a shower. I felt so much better afterwards even though I was wearing camouflage pants and a Slayer T-shirt.
I made it home that morning sometime after 10am and proceeded to do jack shit besides shoot the rest of the cryssy R-man gave me for tagging along. By Monday night I was a wreck and finally busted out the H so I could get some relief. It lasted about as long as it took for me to write my previous post and smoke a cigarette. Before I knew it the speed in my system ate up all the H and I was back where I started. UGH!
I spent most of Tuesday morning online plotting a trip to Oregon and finally passed out sometime last night. Never again! I always say that but maybe this time I'll stick to it....maybe.
So that's it, I finally got it out, hope it was worth the wait Rufus. Tune in next time for a Richie update and possibly a war story if I'm feeling up to it. For the first time in a long time I'm looking forward to a boring week so I doubt there will be much to write about but one never knows with me. Love from muddy New Mexico, Melody

Last night......

.........I went all out with the speed last and I don't know if I can really get into all of it right now. I'm really tired and I broke down just now and did some of the hidden H. Not alot.........well OK a good amount, enough to make the poke worthwhile.
I'm so full of shit, like I wouldn't make a sieve outta myself for a lil taste as well. Big shot, small shot, makes no nevermind to moi. I'm predictable that way.
I really don't think I'm gonna make it long enough to tell the strory of last nights crystal fiasco so I won't even try, I'm sooooooooo sleeeeepy........a little nod wont hurt. It never does. I'll fix the typos tomorrow maybe cocksuckin' spellcheck is for shit!. And let y'all know what happened too. I'ma go now, loves loves loves you all, M.