Friday, December 19, 2008

Part two: Inanity aka my run in with the gangster of love and a rebellious skunk

So I guess I didn't exactly update yesterday like I promised, what can I say, I am an unreliable asshole...........big surprise right? This is gonna be on long drawn out motherfucker, hope y'all are prepared.
Anyway before I get to that I want to piss and moan about the snow we've been getting. I HATE snow! Snow is only fun when A) you've never seen it before B)you're an idiot or C) you drove an hour to wallow around in it and will be driving back to you're slushy-mud free home at the end of the day.
In Bako it snows once every ten years and I liked it that way. I find it extremely discomfiting that despite the fact that I'm in the desert, it's cold as fuck! Oh well, as soon as it starts to get hot, I'll bitch about that too.
Oh and I wanna complain about my MIA smack connect as well. His laggin ass has been reassuring me for over a month and still no product! I'm pissy and impatient but he placated me this morning with the promise of some new H from China. Is it China white? Well he says it's white and it's from China so y'all draw your own conclusions.
He said he would load me up a sampler of the old Afghani shit and the new stuff as soon as he gets it. All I want for Christmas............HAHAHAHAHA........really though, that's all I want. With my shitty luck it won't be til after my birthday. Not too far off but still *pouting* I want it NOW!!!!
Probably shouldn't be loaded with mom in the house, I owe her that much consideration. She spent the last 10 years watching me nod, the least I can do is stay awake for her visit.
On the poppy and shroom front things are looking good. My poppies have begun to show little green shoots and I am babying them no end. I have a special light that keeps 'em nice and toasty in this retarded weather and I have even been good about keeping them on an 18 hour light cycle. I may pull this shit off yet!
The shrooms are still in the planning stages because it is super complicated and I have a shitload of prep to do. Ordinarily I would say fuck it because I'm extremely unmotivated and useless but really I have nothing better to do.
So my night in hell....
As soon as I walked out the door I got this fucked up feeling that I should run back inside. Rainman was driving his big ass SUV cause of the snow and he wasn't alone.
He had Maniac with him. I don't know if I've ever mentioned Maniac before but he's kind of a douchebag.
I'm sure that lame-o name tipped y'all off haha, I'm fairly sure he gave it to himself which makes it even worse. Giving yourself a nickname is pretty high on the "I'm a ginormous tool" list.
Anyway, this guy is one of those wannabe gang bangers who tries to act all hard but is basically a joke. I could do without his 'blood in blood out' monologues but whatever. I opened his door and told his ass to beat it to the backseat. He started to grumble about it but R-man told him to shut it. Maniac knows which side his bread is buttered on.......brown noser.
It was already early evening and I wanted to try and get that money wired but Noooooooooooo! Rainman tells me that we need to go to Cuba like NOW! That he needed me to drive because he was feeling some serious paranoia coming on and he didn't trust lame-o cho-lo with his vehicle. We were gonna stop over in Bloomfield and then head out to Cuba with me behind the wheel.
Now the tweeked out fucker had just come from Aztec, it woulda made more sense for him to hit Bloomfield before he came to get me but heaven forbid he actually do something that makes sense.
We headed out and ended up at some shit-hole of a rock house. The reason that I know it was a rock house was that I was required to go inside and keep R-man company while he did his crack deal. Oh and the fact that every motherfucker in the joint had a pipe glued to his lip was a big tip off as well.
Now I talk alot of shit but I'm honest and I did have my crack moment before I left Bako. I was never what you would call a rock monster and if you bring up my name to anybody there they will automatically associate me with being a hellacious H addict..........but I did smoke crack...occasionally. So the smell of hot Brillo and rock did bring back some sweet memories.
We went into a back bedroom and I sat on the floor and smoked a cigarette, the bed was occupied by an old broad that was like the fattest crackhead I ever saw. She was literally spilled all over the bed, cascading rolls were visible through her mu mu and it was almost hypnotic, the way they undulated and flowed every time she moved.
Freaky! Anyway, I didn't pay too much attention to the transaction because it had nothing to do with me and when I'm with Rainman I always figure the less I know the better. He was done in a few minutes and we were on our way with me behind the wheel, Maniac next to me and R-man smoking up the backseat. I hate it when he does that shit because I'm not a tweeker at heart and the contact always weakens my resolve to say no to the cryssy.
Truthfully I woulda rather smoked some crack but no such luck, so speed it was. We stopped at a gas station and I smoked it up for about 10 min and then we were off.
I got sick of Maniac's commentary pretty quick so I popped some Ministry into the CD player to piss him off and drown him out. I was in the zone haha.
The drive to Cuba took a while, it's halfway to nowhere just like everything else in NM. For anybody in the know, it's like Arvin, CA but worse.
I made R-man direct me to a pharmacy and then made him buy me some new points, if this outing was gonna be bearable I needed to shoot the cryssy, not smoke it. With my recent run in with blood poisoning and all that noise I was taking no chances at re-contamination. I also had him buy me some prep pads and some antibacterial gel, hahah I'm so careful about killing surface germs..........before I go injecting toxic chemicals into my bloodstream. Ironic isn't it.
Anyway we got my necessaries and then he directed me to yet another shady looking house a few blocks off the main highway.
We made our way slipping and sliding through the slushy mud and I managed not to fall on my ass.....for once. R-man was clutching a backpack that contained some illicit substances, several varieties no doubt. I had my pharmacy bag and was feeling more than ready to puncture myself. Speed is shitty and smoking speed sucks if you haven't had a shot or even a line to brace you first, it wears off faster and it's not the same kind of high, at least for me it's not.
So as we knocked on the door Maniac tells me it's his cousin's house and he's just gonna love me! I was like, "What the fuck is that supposed to mean motherfucker?" He just shook his head while Rainman sniggered and looked away. Bastards!
We finally got inside and I was introduced to Loco, Joker and Sleepy....not the most original lineup I've ever heard....I was waiting for the rest of the 7 dwarves to put in an appearance. Loco was Maniac's cousin...I shoulda known seeing as how they shared the same stellar taste in names. The big difference was that these guys were real honest to God bangers, Maniac is just a poser. They were all "strapped" too. God I feel like such a fucktard saying that.
Anyway, as soon as the intros were over I hit up Rainman for enough cryssy to do decent shot and asked Loco if I could use the john to do a hit. He said I could use his room and I didn't trip 'cause he was gonna to be in the kitchen talking business with the boys. I shoulda been on my guard when Rainman sniggered yet again and Maniac gave Loco a look, y'all know the one I mean. Like a dumbass I ignored it and followed him to his room, he gave me a bottle of water and a spoon and left.
Apparently business was conducted in record speed because in the time it took for me to fix up the shot, sterilize my ankle and tie off, Loco was back in the room. I just went about my business and did my thing while he observed. When I was done and had gotten enough breath back to smoke a cigarette, I looked at him and asked, "So what's up?"
He sat on the bed and motioned me to join him but I was pretty damn happy on the floor so I declined. He shook his head and made a face.....a face I'm very familiar with. It was the face a guy makes right before he launches into a spiel about why I need to stop doing what I'm doing. I was in the presence of a captain save a ho! OOOOOOHHHH GOD! At that moment I wanted to kick Rainman in the head and wring Maniac's neck!
While he went on and on about me being too young to be a hard-core hype and blah, blah, blah I was thinking to myself that he was a hypocritical fuckwad because if he was so worried about it why did he let me shoot up in his house? I've heard that speech so many times I could probably recite it by heart, it's always the same and true to form he summed it up with the, "You need a real man to take care of you so you don't have to do that shit"
AAAAARG!!! Why is it that these guys think A) I'm in need of saving B)They're the ones to do it and 3)That I'm in anyway open to being the recipient of said saving?
I'm not.
The fact that he was giving me the speech in a crack house that also happened to be his house made it all the more ridiculous. I mean he was attractive in that tattooed homie kinda way. I have a thing for guys with neck tattoos and he was pretty much covered from the neck down, at least what I could see of him. He was probably in his late twenties and not a bad looking guy but his "let me save you" routine killed it....oh and the fact that I had Casey at home hehe, that too.
I sat through more of his presentation than I normally would have because I was tweekin balls and had become engrossed in my own thoughts. Thankfully this meant I missed out on the rest of his blabbing. Unfortunately he took my silence for acquiescence.
I didn't realize this til he followed me out to the kitchen, put his arm around me and informed Rainman that I would be staying. WHAT??? Maniac busted out laughing at the look on my face and Rainman just looked confused...Tard!
I did my best to make it crystal clear that no, I would NOT be staying and I would be waiting in the truck, keys please. Loco followed me out there and tried to sway me with arguments that I had heard a million times from Josh. This did NOT make me any more receptive, sorry Josh but it's true.
I eventually resorted to the Ministry, I kept cranking the volume back up every time he turned it down so he could talk at me. Haha, handy lil steering wheel volume control......I'm surprised he didn't shoot me, he was getting pretty agitated. I'm sure I've mentioned that tweek does funny things to my person and acting like a 5yr old is one of those things.
He finally gave up and went back in the house but not before he lurched across the center console and shoved his tongue down my throat. He tasted like speed and Lucas limon salt (they were drinking it in their beer), which wasn't a real good combo plus the fact that I was so not into it. He said something but I didn't hear it, volume had mysteriously gone back up hehe........ and then he did that thing where they touch your face and it's supposed to be sweet and sexy but I thought it was unbearably cheesy and my opinion of him sunk even lower!
About 5 minutes after he went inside R-man and Maniac came out and we left. Maniac had a good ol' time giving me shit about his cousin til I threatened to reach over, open his door and push his ass out the truck! Having spent some time in my company on previous occasions, he shut the fuck up.....see I told y'all he was a pussy....or did I call him a lame? Same diff.
So by the time we made it back to Farmington it was way after 10pm and I hadn't a chance in hell of finding a place open to send that wire. My girl had told me that if I couldn't do it before 12am not to sweat it but I wanted to try anyway.
We ended up back at R-man's and I banged another issue and collected my oxy's. He gave me 5 40's and like an 8 ball of speed. UGH! I gave most (but not all hehe), of that shit to Maniac and requested a ride was a long time coming.
The shenanigans weren't over yet, sometime around 4am, one of Rainman's dogs got sprayed by a skunk and came streaking through the dog door. What the fuck???
I thought skunks were supposed to hibernate and shit, why the hell does the one rebel skunk have to put in an appearance while I'm there? Just to spite me, that's why!
I smelled that shit as soon as that dog made it in the trailer and hightailed it to R-man's bedroom and locked the door.....better safe than sorry. Maniac had run outside, maybe he's not as big a fool as I thought haha.
Diesel(the dog) promptly found his daddy (R-man) and climbed all over him. HAHAHAHHAHAHA...NASTY!!! I was stuck in the bedroom for hours with nothing to do but bang speed and play on R-man's shitty laptop. I wanted to save the oxy til I got home and needed to ease down. Maniac climbed in through the window and joined me and for awhile we laughed at the noises coming from beyond the door.....Rainman was NOT pleased, he was bitching up a storm and slamming in and out of the house trying to figure out how to keep Diesel from contaminating the other dogs and how to get rid of the stench.
Tomato juice doesn't really work either. He musta used gallons of it ....from what we could hear haha. I'm still wondering why the fuck he had that much tomato juice on hand to begin with...........
I didn't get home til after 12pm, Maniac called his homeboy to come rescue us, we climbed out the window, yelled goodbye to R-man and beat feet outta there! I had a good lil bag of cryssy left when I got home and all of the oxy, who says I have no restraint?
The pipes were fixed and Casey had switched out the fridge with the new one from the garage. When he got home we finished off the speed and then hours later started banging the oxy. One of those 40's is enough to get each of us off twice if it's been a while without H...which it has.
So it was sweet while it lasted but it never lasts forever and after they were gone I felt the aftermath of all that speed I shot/smoked *sigh* I woulda rather had the crack!
Geez that was a loooooong motherfucker, I'll catch you fuckers later on. Muchos bessos babies, your favorite occasional crackhead, Melody